Partners and Families at Union: Getting to know Brooklyn Vetter

Union is home to many we might never meet in the classroom. We see partners of classmates leaving for work in the morning as we head to class, children creating chalk masterpieces in the quad, and other family members in the elevator on their way to the laundry room. These “others” at Union have a history and a personhood to be known beyond their attachment to our classmates. In an attempt to break down the mystery of these folks I have begun an ongoing project to hold space for the partners and family members of Union students to share their stories. I intend to continue this project for as long as there are narratives to add. My hope is that we might grow in relationship as a whole Union community by hearing these former strangers share their stories and as a whole we can deepen our understanding of and celebrate these wonderful people in our midst. If you are a partner or family member who would like to add to this conversation please email Jess at jm4803@utsnyc.edu. For the first iteration I spoke with Brooklyn Vetter, my neighbor in Hastings Hall, 7th floor.

The Heretic: Who at Union are you attached to? What is their relationship to you?

Brooklyn Vetter: I am partnered with Allison Connelly. She is my partner of 2+ years.

H: How long have you lived in New York City?

BV: Allison and I moved to New York this August to start Allison’s first year here at Union.

H: Have you felt adequately supported by and connected to the Union community as a resident? What could be improved on?

BV: I am a strong introvert but I still feel connected to the campus community, especially Allison’s classmates. It is nice to see people at events, like pub, MN Caucus! or conferences, or walking around campus, whenever I actually leave my apartment. Allison and I happen to be living in an apartment on a dorm floor, which is nice because I get to see people in the kitchen next door and more often in the hallways. I would love more opportunities to open up to others, through events that invite partners to share in vulnerability with students. I know studying, class, and homework take up a majority of time and mental space. Pursuing a degree also deeply connects people who are in the same classes and struggling with the same professors. It would be nice to have a more structured space to check in with people more intentionally, for those attending Union and those just living on campus. But I also recognize I am an introvert who needs to externally process, so I am always craving spaces that go deeper than surface level, no matter community I am a part of.

H: Tell me about your life off of Union’s campus. Do you work? Are you in school? What are some non-Union central things to know about you?

BV: I am working in Jamaica, Queens as the Associate Director of the St Joseph Worker Program, a year long service program for women 21-30 rooted in the charism of the Sisters of St Joseph: moving toward a love of god and neighbor without distinction. Allison and I both did a year of service through this organization in Minneapolis. Through this organization I am also starting to host and organize Nuns and Nones events to connect Sisters with spiritual, potentially unaffiliated or questioning millennials for intergenerational discussion and growth about spirituality and justice. Let me know if you are interested in learning more about the events! Or if you want to do a year of service after you graduate for that matter! ;)

H: Have you made or has it been a desire to build friendships with other Union students or other partners or family members of Union students? What ways of connecting with each other do you have or utilize?

BV: I have made connections and relationships with Union students. I would love to go deeper in those relationships. Same with partners and family members. I have really enjoyed our MN caucus meetings where we can come together and talk about ways we are connected, beyond living at Union or being students. I would love to find more ways that we can connect with each other, especially as an introvert that never wants to leave my apartment. Like I love to crochet. I am learning how to bake. I like reading. I love playing board and card games. If there were more structured events around activities that I could do and get to know people better, beyond Union related events, I would love it! Maybe even a potluck brunch and intentional conversation time once a semester would be lovely! Or a walking group that goes on a walk in Inwood Hill Park or along the river, etc once a semester!

H: How has life changed for you since Allison started school at Union? Anything else of note whether it be perspectives on relationship communication and dynamics, living in a residential hall on a school campus, getting out of the “Union bubble,” or something else that you’d like to add?

BV: Since Allison started at Union it has been a big change. I am from the midwest, South Dakota until I made my way up to Minneapolis as an adult, so New York has been a big change for me. Especially as an introvert, I have struggled to balance personal restorative time, (I can’t go for a walk around a lake or go to a space outside my apartment where I feel alone here), partner time, (Allison and I are learning to live together for the first time in a tiny studio apartment!), phone time with loved ones not here, and having energy to create deep relationships here. If anyone else is having these complicated feelings I’d love to connect or to have a space, that is safe and set where people want to think about complicated feelings together or a group to think about individual and communal goals and share resources about events, spaces, groups to be involved in, inside and outside of Union.